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Relationships

Started by SleepyD, March 29, 2011, 02:43:29 AM

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Nichi

Well, true; maybe I'll pick up on other things :3

Chocofreak13

gl man, report back if anything happens. ^^
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Cockleshell

how do i deal with a messy emotional breakup with less than $10
What's in your hand, back at me. I have it, it's an oyster with two figures of your favorite Touhou characters. Look again, the figures are now vials of the Hourai Elixir. Anything is possible when your waifu smells like Old World and not a man. I'm a frog.

Dr. Kraus

Quote from: Cockleshell on October 15, 2014, 07:35:47 PM
how do i deal with a messy emotional breakup with less than $10


Oh that can be handled quite easily my friend as long as your willing to be harsh!
Just like in the political realm simply cease all contact and break all immediate ties.
If you are obligated to continuously see the person in question, such as sharing the same class there is a simple solution to that.
Like any human simply ignore their presence to the best of your ability, if they are sitting to your right just focus on the presence of the person to your left.
If the person proceeds to attempt contact in some shape or form simply pay no heed to it and move on with whatever you were doing at the time.

Now most people will look at what I just said and respond with something like, "How the hell could you do that, only someone inhuman could do that!".
While that is true it is important to understand that if a ruined relationship is causing massive amounts of trouble for you the best option is to destroy contact with it.
We are human so it can be surprising how easy it is to be this crewel to another person but it is a simple nature we can find within ourselves.

I will say that using this tactic should be a last effort to confront the situation! If you can settle the situation with a better method then please use that one!
I have only had to use this tactic three times in my entire life so far, it can be seen as terrible but can also be the best method in a pinch to move on with life.


Cockleshell

the problem is that she's 2400 miles away and my heart is still hung up on her, and she's still in love with me, but it just hurts too much for both of us to go on any longer.
What's in your hand, back at me. I have it, it's an oyster with two figures of your favorite Touhou characters. Look again, the figures are now vials of the Hourai Elixir. Anything is possible when your waifu smells like Old World and not a man. I'm a frog.

Bella

I don't say this with any rude intent so I deeply apologize if I come off as improper, but - if you still have feelings for her and she still loves you - why is it too difficult to go on? Is it too painful to not be able to actually be together, are the questions about the future just too much, or something else entirely?

Cockleshell

she also has feelings for the trans girl she just moved in with about a month and a half ago. they've been dating on and off for 6 years LDR, and i brought up the topic of a poly relationship, and she considered it but is afraid to ask them about it.
What's in your hand, back at me. I have it, it's an oyster with two figures of your favorite Touhou characters. Look again, the figures are now vials of the Hourai Elixir. Anything is possible when your waifu smells like Old World and not a man. I'm a frog.

Bella

#502
I see....

That's a difficult situation. At least you tried to run the poly thing past her. I wonder why she wouldn't bring it up with her friend/other romantic interest. It can't hurt to try after all...:s

Dr. Kraus

Quote from: Cockleshell on October 16, 2014, 08:30:04 AM
2400 miles away

That's Pittsburgh to San Diego


Its not even worth the trouble mate, relationships are location based 85% of the time within a 200mi perimeter.

If you said 200-500mi I would say it could work but 2,400mi is across the fucking country mate!
Setting yourself up for failure at this point:
1. She has feelings for a trans girl who SHE IS LIVING WITH
2. Your only going to see her maybe once, twice, maybe three times in a single year if you have the money to travel out there

Take it from someone who is most likely going to enter a relationship soon but will be moving away 1,500 miles by the end of the year, I hope we can stay together but I'm knowing to the fact that with a large distance we have a high possibility of breaking up.

Really all you have to do is what I said before, simply cease all contact and break all immediate ties.

Good luck my friend!

Cockleshell

i've been with her for 10 months, we broke up exactly on our 10 month anniversary. i'm a broke college student, she lives in an expensive part of utah. i... can't bring my self to do that. Probably end up dating some dude here at college. uughghhhh.
What's in your hand, back at me. I have it, it's an oyster with two figures of your favorite Touhou characters. Look again, the figures are now vials of the Hourai Elixir. Anything is possible when your waifu smells like Old World and not a man. I'm a frog.

Dr. Kraus

Wait, you want to stay with her because of monetary reasons? I mean I'm a broke ass college student making a decent amount of money from my part-time job but still.

Really? If that is the case then I'm speechless, monetary gain shouldn't play a factor within a relationship if two people really care about each other.

But if she was the one who wanted to break up, why chase someone who doesn't want you?

Chocofreak13

i'm seconding kraus's last point; chasing after someone who ditched you is only setting yourself up for more pain. i wasted 7 years off and on doing that and ruined myself a bit in the process. given all the drama and the distance, i'd say this may be a good catalyst to move on. it'll hurt, but it'll hurt more to continue.

one of my best friends is poly, and has partners all over the country (the closest one is about an hour and a half away). however, she talks to her partners frequently, they're all poly, and all of them are stable and open with their communication, meaning little to no drama occurs, even with the distance. there is the loneliness factor, but she's willing to put up with it for the sake of the relationships. however, given the instability, jealousy, and issues that she (and you, a little) needs to work through, i don't see it ending well if you try to go this route. :\
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Bella

Quote from: Dr. Kraus on October 16, 2014, 02:48:33 PM
Its not even worth the trouble mate, relationships are location based 85% of the time within a 200mi perimeter.

I suppose my significant other and I should call it quits because we live ~700mi away from each other and can rarely meet, huh mate?

Quote from: Dr. Kraus on October 16, 2014, 06:12:17 PM
Really? If that is the case then I'm speechless, monetary gain shouldn't play a factor within a relationship if two people really care about each other.

Neither should distance, for godssake.

Cockleshell

#508
n o n o N O i'm not with her for monetary reasons, what the fuck? no. i'm saying the reason we can't be together is because we're both strapped as fuck for money and it will never work out. it's a love that never will be.

honestly, no, ugh. i'm done talking about it here. not so hot for my mental health
What's in your hand, back at me. I have it, it's an oyster with two figures of your favorite Touhou characters. Look again, the figures are now vials of the Hourai Elixir. Anything is possible when your waifu smells like Old World and not a man. I'm a frog.

Chocofreak13

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